Sincere Thank You!

Picture from Pixabay

I am away right now taking care of some personal things in my life.  It is so hard to stay away, especially when I want to share so much. But, soon.

Right now, I just want to say a few words and thank you to those who have continued to support me and be there for me through all I have been going through.  

Thank you first to all of you who follow and read my blog.  It means so much that you would give your time to me, if even just a few minutes.  To those that support and give me feed back.  It lets me know that I am reaching someone, either to share in something or to give a piece of information you may need or needed to read again. Or to just enjoy a story that may touch you in some way.  (Good, I hope 😉 )

Thank you to the community I have immersed myself in and that have taken me in.  I know at times I was probably questioned at first for being real in why I was here and what I was about.  I was not sure at first about the answer to those questions.  I am slowly finding my purpose and niche in being here.  Initially it was to just share my feelings and things I was going through and experiencing.  I was writing in both fiction and in personal experience to see what would feel right.  Both do really, but I am finding my writing “voice” the more I am here.  I know I will continue in this way and keep growing.  

Thank you to those in the community that have become my friends and fast growing acquaintances that I hope develop into a wonderful friendship.  It means so much to be accepted, understood and knowing there are those around that can share things with me that I thought I was alone in.  I have learned so much and keep absorbing all the information.  I feel I am finding my true self because of you all! <3

Thank you to @TheGentlemansR1 (The Gentleman’s Relish) for his love and support of all I do and share.  It means so much to know you are by my side and enthusiastically encouraging me with my writing, experiences, learning and new ventures! 

Thank you again, everyone, for being here and in my life.  I am excited to see where this and all my other projects go in the coming years and hope you will be there through them all with me.  

Bless every single one of you! 

~Kurvy

I Have Come To Realize

What I have come to realize in the last few years is there is such a huge misunderstanding about erotica, BDSM lifestyle (and all that goes with it), sex bloggers/writers and sex workers.  Each topic is not all black and white as many have decided it is.  So, it is important to read up on, research and get to understand each one.

There are so many that are so great at what they do and talk about.  And they are normal people.  Like you and me.  They are good hearted, truthful, open minded, loyal and just normal.  Yes, some may have things they deal with on a daily basis, but, who doesn’t for the most part??  

And yes, some are the actual “bad apples” that make these things seem so bad.  But they are not the majority.  

These people that do the blogging, writing and sharing may seem like stars and heroes to some.  (Yes, I have my fangirl moments with some I have met in person or talk to in a message! Ha!)  They may seem out of reach and unapproachable.  But, I have found, most are very approachable and willing to talk.  

The thing is, they are not evil. They are not “devil worshipers” and not people to be afraid of. 

So many are willing to open up their personal lives for others to understand.  They are willing to let people see that they are just like other people out in the world.  I have seen how they have helped others understand themselves.  How they have touched others with things they have shared.  

I have seen a community support each other through judgements and misunderstandings.  Not just from public perception, but also from family and friends.  It is hard when those you love do not even try to understand.  Just because you enjoy a different way of life and just because you are different from them.  

And yet, through all this, they are steadfast in their beliefs, in what they feel is important information to get out there and share.    There is so much that people don’t understand and want to know more about.  There are people struggling that were not brought up to be comfortable in who they are.  People that don’t know and understand their own bodies.  Those that were either brought up to be ashamed of their bodies and needs, or had no one to teach them and educate them more about sex and being comfortable in their own skin.

I have found that not many close to us understand nor want to accept change.  Not only in those they love and think of in one way, but definitely not themselves.

So, yes, I feel that what these special people do and share is so important and so amazing.  

There is a lot of good in what is shared here.  

Furthermore, for better understanding of these topics, this is my take of each of these topics. In contrast, I am including the given definition by Merriam-Webster:

Erotica writing, both fiction and non-fiction, helps those that write as well as those that read.  Understanding ourselves and things that we want to experience and learn about in regard to sex or some kinks.  It doesn’t have to be straight out explicit sex, but that which arouses one sexually.

Merriam-Webster definition of Erotic:

1: of, devoted to, or tending to arouse sexual love or desire erotic art
2: strongly marked or affected by sexual desire

BDSM lifestyle has so many avenues to explore and a person needs to find what is right for them.  Be it bondage and discipline, Domination and submission, Sadism and masochism; there are so many different aspects of this lifestyle, as long as it is gone into as safe, sane and consensual adults.  

Merriam-Webster definition of BDSM:

: sexual activity involving such practices as the use of physical restraints, the granting and relinquishing of control, and the infliction of pain BDSM refers to a range of sexual preferences that generally relate to enjoyment of physical control, psychological control, and/or pain. It can be broken down into six overarching components: bondage and discipline, domination and submission, and sadism and masochism. Bondage and discipline consist of using physical or psychological restraints, domination and submission involve an exchange of power and control, and sadism and masochism refer to taking pleasure in others’ or one’s own pain or humiliation. Those who practice BDSM may identify with one or more, in any combination, of these components.— Ali Hebert and Angela Weaver, Canadian Journal of Human Sexuality, August 2014

Sex bloggers/writers are those that share their lives and stories, both fiction and non-fiction, real life experiences and fantasies they would like to explore.  They are also there to offer information and input into things that others may be interested in, places to look for information and what they have gone through themselves.  

(No specific definition for this 😉 )

Sex workers; that phrase covers such an extensive area.  It is said that sex workers are not only those that pleasure clients in sex, but those that write about sex to help others find pleasure in writing, those that talk over the phone about sex, and so much more.  

Merriam-Webster definition:

: a person whose work involves sexually explicit behavior

I have only touched lightly on these subjects.  There is so much research, information and learning that can be done on all these subjects.  

Suggested Sites for Information:

There are so many bloggers and writers in this community that you can learn from and pull information from.  I know I have learned so much from them.

I can also say that I have received an immense amount of support from some of those I love as well as this amazing community.

Because there are those of you searching and learning, being new or somewhat experienced, I am going to share some writers, bloggers and podcasters below that I have learned so much from not only in the beginning but throughout the last few years:

(I know this is not all of them and I apologize if not all mentioned.  I will most likely come back and add as I think about others)

Kalya Lords

Loving BDSM

Rebel Notes

Girl On The Net

Molly’s Daily Kiss

E.L.Byrne

Posy Churchgate

Jayne Renault

Victoria Blisse

Proud To Be Kinky

Floss Does Life

May More

Cara Thereon

Dr. J.

Ria Restrepo

Cousin Pons

Lascivious Lucy

Brigit Delaney

F. Dot Leonora

Violet Fawkes

Taking Time

I have been a bit over doing it recently in all aspects of my life.  So, I have taken a small hiatus to regroup.  No worries.  Nothing to take me away for long.  Just needed a short break.  Am working on a project and a few stories and will soon be sharing.

Checking in to show my support with likes and comments.

Have a great week and see you all soon! <3

xx

Always Changing

*Photo from Pixabay

I have changed so much since starting my blog (The one before this and on into this one).  I have learned so much and because of this am different than who I was and where I was when I first started.  

I began my blog to have a place to share my thoughts and feelings, hoping to get some feed back and maybe find others in the same place I was; as well as write and get involved in a community where I can be me.   

Starting out I did this.  I shared my thoughts and feelings of where I was at the time, things I was going through, and tried to do a bit of writing.  In the writing I thought, well, I am creative, I can do this no problem.  Wrong! I didn’t know how or where to start.

Once I realized there were memes and prompts to participate in, I thought it would be so great to tell stories and hopefully others would like them too.  

Well, then I read others’ posts and stories; all personal, real life and fictional.  Still thinking my work was up to par with others, I was disappointed I wasn’t getting many likes or comments, as well as not getting picked as a top three in the weekly choices.  So, I started paying more attention to what others were writing.  I started really taking in how others write and what gets the attention of readers.  There are different reasons, of course and different genres in the sexy stories I read.  I also started commenting along with the liking, because I know how much I appreciate having a comment or two.

I was getting followers left and right and building my follow count pretty well but still would only get a comment or like here and there occasionally.  So, I decided I would continue to participate and change things up a bit.  I love writing fictional stories and fantasies.  So, I started writing more of these recently.  I also decided to jump into the Smut Marathon.  I knew, if nothing else, I would learn and hopefully get better at my writing.  

I have found I am a cliché kinda girl and didn’t realize it.  So, once again, I am trying to change things up.  

Just a day or two ago I came across one of the bloggers posting about feeling that “imposter syndrome”.  It hit me.  I have been feeling that way a lot lately.  That I am a fraud, an imposter, and not good enough to be a part of this writing community and these wonderful writers I participate in writing with. (There goes that anxiety/mind taking over to protect me thing that happens.)

But I want to be so badly and know in my heart that I can because it’s what I love. 

I look up to all these great writers and when I met so many of them recently I felt overwhelmed, excited and fan-girlish (is that a word?) because I want to be like them.  I know, I know….I can’t be like them.  I am my own person.  But, I want to be really good at this writing thing.  I want to move people.  I want them to want more.  I have been told by a few that they really like my stories, which has made me feel excited and happy.  I just want to REALLY touch people, move them in a way I feel when I read other writings.  

I can see a change in a lot of my writing but know I need to do so much more.  I will continue to work on things, pay attention to what makes other stories so great, get feed back and take it in to be used as I can, and to enjoy getting to know the other writers I am so in awe of.  (And which are becoming friends!)

I am a work in progress.  In so many ways.  

Thank you to each and every one of you that take the time to read my blog.  It means so much!

<3

Somebody Special – Nina Nesbitt

“That I don’t have to settle
Not for nobody, not for nobody
I’ve been loosing myself but lately
You got me thinking maybe, I got potential
To be somebody, to be somebody
To be somebody special”

I know there are many out there, along with me, that need to hear this.  I just love what this song says and had to share. <3

 

My Own Sexy Ménage à Trios

*Picture is from the beautiful Marie Rebelle of Rebel’s Notes

It’s very quiet over here, like I am home alone. But I’m not…

My roomies are here.  Both in their shorts and t-shirts.  Bo, with brown hair, all six feet, three inches of bronze body and works out to get himself so toned.  Tim on the other hand, plays sports, so, solid six feet, athletic physique and blonde.  All the girls fall for him.  Playing their game, headphones on, being all macho and totally focused on beating one another.  I could be doing anything and they wouldn’t even know.  

Maybe watching a sex video. Getting turned on and playing with my cunt. Getting completely naked right on the couch, playing with my nipples and making them stand at attention, my body needing more.  

Hmmm, sounds fun! Not my norm, but definitely a sexy daring idea.  

But, here I sit with my auburn hair up in a pony tail, work out pants and sports bra on.  I did some yoga this morning before coming in here to read and watch these guys in their quiet war.  I would be a complete klutz trying to get out of these pants easily.

‘There are other ways to enjoy myself,’ I think.  And although this book is really hot, I want visual.  I put down my book and pick up my tablet.  I look back at the guys and they are totally engrossed in their game.  

I find a great threesome video and start watching it.  It’s so real.  No fake noises or acting. I put myself in the girl’s place.  Imagine myself being the one with the two guys.  Being played with and enjoyed by them.  I have dreamed of it so often.  Who wouldn’t, living with two roommates like these guys to be around daily?   

I’m so horny it’s automatic that my hand slides down and into my pants.  Finding my folds. I caress them slowly with my fingers, sliding up and down and finding my clit at the top.  Circling and putting a little pressure on it. Feeling so good, I want more.  

Propping the tablet up on a pillow on the cushion beside me, I now have both hands available.  Glancing over at the guys, they are still playing but have slowed down.  I pause to watch a moment to make sure they are not stopping.  They banter back and forth a few minutes than continue on with their game.  

So I now ramp up my game.  Having both hands, one on my clit and the other finger fucking my pussy.   I’m so lost in my enjoyment and need that I have lost focus on the guys and don’t see that they have noticed me and have stopped playing their game to watch me at mine.  

My eyes closed now, not focused on the scene in front of me on the tablet, I don’t realize until I feel extra hands on the tips of my breasts that I am not alone any more.  My eyes open, startled to see Bo there, looking down at me.  Tim is kneeling beside me where my hands are.  

He looks back at me, blue eyes hot with desire, “Can we help?”

I hesitate.  Even though I have wanted this for so long, I was scared it would ruin our relationship as roomies, so I never pursued it.  

“This is something we have wanted with you, Jesse.  Please say yes,” Bo says, gorgeous brown eyes pleading.  

I nod and in a split second, pants and bra are off and gone.  The guys are naked and I am no longer watching the video, but experiencing my own sexy ménage à trois.

My Sexy #SoSS

My Sexy #SoSS

Trying to get back in the swing of things.  It is taking some time to get used to this self-hosted site and how it works.  A big huge shout out to @DomSigns for all his help and dealing with this half-techie understanding person. Thank you!!  And to Violet Fawkes of @fireandhoney and Love, Violet for my Avi and Header art, thank you, I love it!! 

Now, on with my share…

I was able to get in my Masturbation Monday and Friday Flash posts this week.  I was so frustrated because I couldn’t seem to come up with something for Wicked Wednesday, which I love to participate in as well.  These all help me in continuing to get better at my writing and I am so grateful to you all for offering these prompts for others to participate in!

If you would like to participate in any yourself, please check out Marie Rebelle’s #SoSS to see a list of prompts and memes to pick from.

My faves of the week:

Masturbation Monday –

Club Dress: Pleasurable Pain by Asrai Devin – Such a hot little story

Human Tales by Kisungura – Check out one hot little fairy

My Beautiful Stone Fairy by A Leap of Faith – Such a sweet romantic tale

Wicked Wednesday –

Double Your Pleasure by Love, Violet – Hot M/M short story 😉

Primitive by F. Dot Leonora – Quite a curious possible double life look. Wow!

[That’s My Kink] Masochism by Floss Does Life – Such a personal look into Flosses life <3

Friday Flash (So Far) –

Tangled Up In You by Ria Restrepo – Hot office sex you just can’t miss!

Artistic License by Lascivious Lucy – Very hot F/F short story

Open Mouth by F. Dot Leonora – Oh how thoughts can work for such a sexy session

These are all amazing posts and there are so many more! So, please go and check out as many prompts/memes as you can.  Give the writers likes and comments and share the love.

Thank you and Happy Easter!!

Day 3 of 30 Days of D/s – Titles & Labels

*Pixabay

What Titles and Labels Do You Prefer?

Some titles for Dominants may be Master, Sir, Daddy, Mistress, Lady, etc. Titles for submissives can be pet, babygirl, little one, boy, girl, etc.

Titles and Labels.  Some love them, some like them and some don’t like them at all.  Every person is different as is each relationship.  I think there are several I like but would never see myself as having, nor my partner.  And this can always change.  As relationships change I have known some to change titles and labels as well.  

Like, for instance, a couple starting out, call each other Sir and sub or maybe babygirl.  Then for some reason, as they develop, the Sir becomes also Daddy and the sub becomes not only babygirl but kitten or little one.  Or, maybe they had titles or labels and decided it was best to not have them at all.   

I honestly prefer babygirl or kitten.  They are sweet and just describe me the best.  And I can only see calling my Dom Sir or Daddy.  Now this of course can change, if the dynamic changes.  

To me, and not all people will see it this way, but, a nurturing, loving, guiding Dom is seen as a Daddy Dom or Sir.  A submissive under a Daddy Dom is immediately thought of as being in diapers, sucking a pacifier, etc…, that is the normal first thought of those hearing the name Daddy Dom.  I know it was for me when first learning these titles and labels.  He does not necessarily have a submissive that is a little who likes to dress up in little clothing or diapers, but there are those under a Daddy Dom that do.  

Yet, that is not me.  I am more of the submissive that likes to have a bit of discipline play, be able to have that “little” side of pouting, enjoy coloring and watching or reading Disney or happy movies.  That is not my normal day-to-day persona but it is there.  It gives me a chance to break away from responsibilities and just be silly for a while.

I also like to curl up on the couch, read, have quiet time, and just enjoy being me as an adult.  Writing, listening to music, having a good glass of wine and having me time.  As some would call, self-care time.  Everyone needs that kind of time.  

Not only submissives, but Dominants as well.  It’s very important for a relationship to have the time for self-care.  Each partner doing this is better at being more responsive and better communicators.  When they are able to have the time to regroup, take care of themselves and feel better about themselves before coming back to the partnership that needs to be strong, it helps.  I have seen it and experienced it.  [Oh! Went off on a tangent….oops!]

So, my take on the whole Titles and Labels is yes, I agree with them and these (above) are the ones I am into.  

Do you agree? Or like other ones better?

*Go to LovingBDSM to see more on these D/s topics <3 *

Day 2 of 30 Days of D/s

What Does Submission Mean To You?

Submission means something different to each sub out there.  It could mean being a slave to a Master.  It could mean a baby girl to a Daddy.  It could mean a Kitten to a Sir.  It could mean something different from any of these.  

To me, submission is being a strong person through life and everyday things but to give control over to a man/woman so that she/he can find her/his true self.  To accept guidance and love, understanding and discipline.  To agree to be a partner and know when to take a break and talk about changes needed to live a good D/s life.  To know we are all not perfect and there has to be communication, trust and love through a relationship to make it work.  

Submission is not something that comes out of a story book, even though most of us would love it to be.  It is something that is earned and given in trust and love.  It is something that is worked on and developed.  

It is not given freely without being earned.  Both parties have to be open and willing to work on the relationship.  It is not a one way street. Not just one person is involved.  

When first understanding my submissive side, I thought I was just here to please a Dom(me).  My mission was to do as a Dom(me) wanted, no questions asked.  Boy was I wrong!

I then found that I had rights and there were rules to follow and agreements between both parties to guide.  Yes, it is consensual, but there are safety points and words, to use and understand.  Not only does a submissive have to feel safe, but so does a Dominant.  For even if a Dominant is there to guide and control a submissive, he has to do it at the safety of that submissive and of him/herself as Dominant.  

So, I have learned and hope others realize; be patient, find the right partner that will work with you and will, as a partner, make decisions with you that are right for the both of you.  So that you both feel strong and in agreement that what you do together is safe, sane and consensual.  Always.

*Picture from Pixabay

30 Days of D/s through Loving BDSM