A Better Me

*Pixabay

Because of other things that were going on in my life, I did not get this post out last week for Wicked Wednesday. But what a great week to share this instead!

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I am a better me today, at this moment, because of things I have been through, things I have learned, people that have been, and are, in my life. For the family, friends, acquaintances, people I know and don’t know, I am a better me for all these things.  

But especially for the man that has been by my side through the mess that is me. Every single bit in the last few years. He has supported me, boosted me up, argued with me and pushed me forward when needed. He has been my stronghold through it all. My man has been there loving me and guiding me through the hard times and the good times. He has not given up on me when I didn’t understand why. He is my rock and so much more than I could ever explain. Gave me a place to run to, a person to talk to and confide in and a reason to keep on going when I wanted to give up. He is so much to me and more.

@TheGentlemansR1 has been non-wavering and loving me through it all. I love him for everything he is and always has been.

He knows when I have had my times of internal battles. When my inner voice has told me all the things to make me stressed and anxious; where I am almost at the breaking point. He has pulled me up when I thought I couldn’t be. He has always pushed me to do what I needed to do in getting help in counseling and anything else that would help me get through it all. Such as, self-care in exercise, massages, meditation, doctor, whatever I might possibly need, he urged me on.

I always thought I was a strong person.  He and others say I am, more than I know.  But, I honestly have not felt I am, especially while going through so much in the last couple of years. A lot of things and people have affected me, how I am and how I see myself. I have acted and reacted in the wrong way.

Once I had given up trying to make things right, I gave up believing it could change. So I did not have boundaries, nor did I respect myself enough to change things when I knew they were wrong. I feel I have been judged, misunderstood and criticized by so many I care about. It is my belief that I have allowed myself to lose the person I am by trying to please others and take care of others first. I believe because of this, others do not understand why I am making myself a priority right now.  To find the me I am supposed to be so that they can respect the person I am. No, they may not understand, nor agree with the person I am. Just as long as they realize I am still me, yet a better version of me.  

I believe no one should judge another human being.  No one really knows what that person is or has gone through.  If you are going to judge someone, just realize you, at some point in your life, will be judged too. If you do not understand a person and that person’s ways, get to know them, talk to them, so that you can understand, at least a little bit. 

Do not criticize a person.  They may be different than you. Do different things than you. Have a different way of looking at things and the world than you. This does not make them wrong.  It does not make either one of you wrong. Just different. Is that so difficult? If we were all the same, did the same things, thought the same way, acted the same way, looked the same way, what a boring world this would be.  This statement is so true. Someone very wise that loves me has said this more than once.

As always, I still want everyone around me happy.  Happy in me and happy in their own lives.  I feel there is so much hate and unhappiness in this world.  I know you can’t be happy all the time.  But looking at the positive side of things as much as possible does help in having better days, better relationships and better moods.  Yes, some days are more difficult than others to find that positive outlook. No matter what, you are alive and able to change things if you set your mind to it. 

I have gone a bit off the subject.  When I touch on something I feel strongly about, that is what I do.  And I seem to be able to write things down to make a point much better than saying them.  

I just want to thank all those that support me, and especially the man that is always by my side as my support, friend, guide, protector, and love.  

I have a way to go still but I know I am on the right track.

Thoughts and More

 *Image by Zebra Rose.  Image originally published on Twitter and used with permission.

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Thoughts of him fill her mind.  His tall height, his strong build, his kinky mind, his powerful constant need for her, even his overwhelming lust for more; all had her so turned on and horny for him. He wouldn’t be home for a while still and she needed to quench this thirst and want for him.  

She took a bath with fragrant bubbles to relax her mind and turn it to other thoughts, yet all it did was make her feel even more sensual and because of this she started running her hands over her body.  She started with her left hand going up her neck and back down, sliding to her taught nipples as her right hand joined the left.  Both slid down over her stomach, to her mound and smooth cunt.  The feeling was amazing as she imagined him there with her, picturing him in her mind and the way he watches and touches her.  She catches her breath and decides to dry off and continue this on their bed. 

She lays across the bed and continues exploring her body, seeing him in her mind as she has seen him so many times, getting pleasure from watching her please herself for him.  Knowing damn well that she is turning him on more and more as she touches her pussy and plunges her fingers in to bring them back out wet and creamy with her juices.  Showing him how much she wants this, how much she wants him.  

She is lost in this fantasy.  Lost in the way she feels, as always, when she is turning both him and herself on with this sexy scene.  She opens her eyes, thinking of him and sees him standing by the bed watching her.  She holds her breath.  He is actually right there, really there.  No imagining now.  She pauses and he tells her, “don’t stop. Continue.”  

Letting out a sigh, she continues, watching him closely.  Knowing even though she is not supposed to be doing this without him, he is here now, and he wants her.  He watches intently as she continues to touch herself, continues to bring herself closer and closer to climax.  As she does, he undresses and stands by intently taking her in, cock hard and ready for her.  She is so close, breathing faster, blood rushing to her cheeks and to her pussy.  As she is about to cum, he stops her and she moans.  He then takes over and brings her to orgasm with his own skilled hands and fingers.  He has her turn over and he fucks her, cock in pussy and fingers on clit.  Bringing her back up fast and hard as they both release together.  

“Damn, I love watching you!” he says, sounding satisfied.  She smiles and snuggles in to him as they lay there in each other’s arms catching their breath.  “Ready for more?” he asks.  

“Oh yes, please!” she says with a sinfully greedy smile.  

 

Fantasy in Poem

*Pixabay

As I searched for something to choose for my fantasy writing, I saw that so many of us women have the same fantasies.  Nice to know we aren’t alone.  But I want to do something different. So…

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As I am guided into the room

It feels as dark as a tomb

With a blindfold over my eyes

So I can fully experience my surprise

Pulled over to the edge of a bed

I sense there is another body instead

Of just my lover and mine

And a tingle goes up my spine

I am laid back upon the mattress 

Then feel what seems like a cactus 

Rolling, prickly down my chest and over my nipple

A person moves closer and there is a ripple

In the bed covers and my body

Sensing all the possible naughty

Things we will be doing for this time together

As they have me tethered

In this time and space

I can’t believe I am in this place

Where my fantasies will be given

And all we share driven

By our insatiable desires all night long.

Warped and Perverted Thing To Do

“You are so warped!” Maggie laughs as Max tells her what he has planned for her, “But I like it!”

“I thought you would.”

“So where are we going and what do we need to do?”

“I have everything planned.  Since we planned on coming here to this club I have been planning.  We are going into the private rope and harness room. I will just need you to strip bare so I can get to you easily once we are in there.”

“Okay! I’m really excited about this.”

“Me too.”

As they enter the room Maggie takes off all her clothes and stands waiting for Max to direct where he needs her to be.  

Once he has set out the things he will use on the table he directs her to stand under the pulley.  He works the rope around her body, making a harness around her chest and back area.  He then has her lay down on the mat she is standing on and proceeds to tie her legs and connect that bit to the harness.   Fastening her to the pulley, lifting her up off the mat and into the air where she is now suspended.  Working on it a bit more, making sure he has secured her properly.  Each sensitive area open for him to reach and use. 

She watches, breathing steadily, knowing what his plan is and wondering how she will react once he starts.  

The whole time he has focused on tying the rope, he constantly checks in to make sure she is okay; the rope wasn’t too tight or loose and touching her every now and then to keep them connected.  

She feels so different suspended this way.  She is excited in anticipation on how he will take this, yet confident she will enjoy this time they share.  He walks over and places a blindfold over her eyes.  

“I want you to just feel.  You know my plan, but I don’t want you to see each thing I will be doing.  Just enjoy.”

“Yes, Sir,” she says with a smile.

The first thing she feels is such a slight touch she is not sure what it is, or if it is actually anything, until he moves from her arm to her right breast with it, to her nipple.  She shivers.  A feather!  He swirls it around each nipple, down her belly to her mound.  Teasing it around that most sensitive area and on down her legs.  He touches right on the underside of her right knee and she giggles.  

“Ssshhh…” he says with a smile.  

She pinches her lips together to try and hold another giggle in as he does the same to the other knee. 

He continues, but this time it is something that has more than one feather.  Or is it bristles, like a brush?  Oh yes, that is it.  Like a paint brush.  

His light touch moves down to her feet and she flinches when he reaches right on the bottom of her left foot.  He wiggles and curls it around.  She can’t help the laugh that escapes from her mouth this time.  She twists her head from one side to the other, squeezing her eyes shut, even though blindfolded.  Her reaction is even more so with her right foot.  Trying to move her legs, but can’t as they are tied in a way she cannot move away at all.   

“Mmmm…I found a really sensitive spot here,” she hears him smile as he says, “lets see where else you might be ticklish and sensitive.”

He continues up and down her body finding each and every spot with different items he uses.  After the brush, he uses a small flogger, then a crop. Last but not least, his fingers.  Oh the response he receives from just the use of his fingers after all he had done is the best! She laughs so hard that she screams.

Now that was a perverted thing to do for play, but they both loved it.  

Once back home after their session, they had great sex and then a wonderful, exhausted sleep. 

Erotic Photo – Wicked Wednesday

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So, this week’s Wicked Wednesday prompt is:

If I was taking an erotic photograph of you, I would ask you to…

I was going to share my view on erotic photos but decided to write a short story instead. 😉

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Before my photo shoot we decided on what I would wear and what prompts I would use in some of the photos.  As Sean sets up his cameras and equipment I change into my first “costume” which is lingerie and I do my makeup.  We will be using the bed and a chase lounge for the pictures.

I walk into the room where Sean has finished setting up.  In my red lace lingerie and sheer cover, I am ready.  He stops, looks me over and tells me to sit on the chase lounge.  I sit on the edge as he is getting ready to start shooting and he looks at me and laughs.

“Relax.  Sit back on the chase with your legs outstretched on it.  Imagine you are just lounging.  Enjoying a good book and a glass of wine.  That’s it.”  As I sit a bit on my right side with my arm resting over the side, I look over to my left.  He begins by directing me where to look and at times adjusts my position and cover to where he thinks I would look the sexiest.  His touch warms my skin.

He tells me of things to think about and starts asking me about what I desire or would really like.  He begins with foods, places and things to just get me thinking of anything other than what he is doing.  Then he moves on to people and desires of the body.  I could feel my cheeks turn warm and lost myself in the thoughts he was provoking.

He said he had enough pictures of me in that outfit and to change to the next.  I went back and changed into my corset, thongs, garters and stockings.  This time he has me go over to the bed.  First taking pictures of me laying over the bed or leaning on the side.

“Okay you little minx, climb up on the bed and pose like a good submissive.  Ass up and head down with arms stretched out in front of you.  Oh yes, that’s it.”  He takes several pictures, moving closer as he does.  He then moves my one leg closest to him in, as if I’m beginning to crawl or open myself up for him.  This move has me realize I am wet between my thighs with the thoughts that have been flowing through my mind as I see myself in these erotic poses.

He places a crop up against my ass as he continues clicking away.  He then lays the flogger by my side and takes a few more photos.  I catch my breath just thinking of the possibilities this all could bring.

“I’m going to get your cheeks a little rosy.  You okay with that?  I think it will look great in these pics!” Sean says.

“Okay.  Go for it,” I say. [Oh yes, please!]

He pops me lightly with his hand and then slowly gets a bit harder and faster.  I hear his breathing getting faster and can tell he is getting turned on by spanking my ass.

I say, “Go ahead and use the crop if you think it might help or even the flogger.”

“Mmmm…” he stops reluctantly and massages my cheeks.  “Sure.  I can try that.”

I look back for a second and see the bulge in the front of his trousers and scoot my bum back a bit for a better target.  He tries the crop first and I can tell he is enjoying the sharp popping he is getting from it.  He stops and looks at his handy work, puts down the crop and picks up the flogger.

I tell him to hold that thought and I remove my corset and throw it on the side of the bed.  Moving back into position, he stalls for a second and then continues.  He starts slowly and sweetly like he is caressing my skin.  Then as he moves up and down from my bottom to my back he starts getting a bit harder with his strokes so as to leave some marks that can be seen.  I am getting lost in the sensations and space it is taking me to.

He stops and places the crop back up against my bum and the flogger across my legs.  Then he picks up my corset and lays it beside me.  Picking up his camera he proceeds to take more pictures of me.

“Look at me,” he says, “I want to see that passion and lust in your eyes now.”

I look at him, feeling my cheeks are rosy and my eyes are watering and unfocused from the space I am in.

“Oh yes!” he says, “There’s my passionate erotic kitten come out to play.”

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