Whatever BDSM/Kink – Day 30 of 30 Days of Kink

fullsizeoutput_47abDay 30: Whatever BDSM/kink related thing you want to write about.

This being my last day of “30 Days of Kink” I decided I will write about the one thing that thrills both Daddy and me in kink….Spankings!

I honestly never thought I would like spankings.  But once I was asked several times what made me think of looking into BDSM and kink and, by looking, what in kink made me wet.  I kept going back to the day a friend of mine put me over his knees and spanked me.  I felt ashamed that he would do that in front of others (and cried)…AND I realized I was wet and turned on by it!!  WHAT??!!

I was hesitant at first about actually letting Daddy spank me.  But, once he started, and I saw the pleasure it gave him, and felt the pleasure and pain I felt from him giving them to me, I was hooked.  I am finding I like certain implements better than others.  I am finding the ones I like best in wood and leather.  I have found the ones I have a limit to and those that I had a limit to but no longer do.

The thrill Daddy gets from spankings of course is different than my thrill.  For me sometimes its an “Eeeek!” rather than a thrill, but none the less it gets that adrenaline going in me knowing I will be receiving a spanking from Daddy, whether for good or bad.  If it is for bad, he makes me aware of why and that it is not an enjoyable spanking and most likely it will be only that.  Or he will make sure he has gotten his point across before going into an enjoyable part of our play time.  If it is a good spanking than I know I will not only be feeling pain but pleasure along with it.

Either way he makes sure I know what is coming and that I am ready.  We enjoy our time together and make the most of it since we are still in a LDR.  I look forward to so much more!

I hope you have enjoyed my 30 Days of Kink and until next time, stay fun and kinky! And if there is anything you would like to ask or know that you thought of while reading my 30 Days, I am willing to answer, so ask away!! 🙂

*Pic used from Pinterest

 

 

BDSM Title? – Day 29 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 29: Do you have a BDSM title(eg mistress, master, slut, pig, whore, Sir)? What is your opinion of these titles in general?

I guess I do…

Well, yes…I am submissive.  Daddy calls me Kitten and baby girl, so I am all these things in our relationship and they are titles he has given me, which I adore.

Where titles are concerned, in general, I think is such a broad spectrum in conversation for those in the BDSM community.  Some are very serious about having titles and going by them, while others do not like titles at all and are happy to just know what they like and go with that.  Then there are those in between those.

So, my opinion is if you like them, by all means stick with them.  If you don’t, once again, by all means go with how you feel.  I don’t believe you must have a specific title to know where your place is in the BDSM world.  It’s nice to know what the title would be and I have titles because of Daddy, as he does because of me, but that’s how we are.  It’s so simple. 🙂

*Pic used from Pinterest

 

 

 

Kink/BDSM Play Attire – Day 28 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 28: How do you dress for kink/BDSM play? What significance does your attire have to you?

Oh gosh! There are so many different attires for different kink/BDSM play.  So it depends on the play we have planned as to what I dress in.

If we want sexy, Daddy will have me dress in corset, stockings, gloves and heels.  If it is to be school girl spankings, I will dress in, you guessed it, school girl attire.  Daddy has other dress attire he likes to have me dress in, such as cheerleader, flight attendant, maid and even kitten, with collar, tail and ears.  Then sometimes it will be absolutely nothing.

Whatever we desire for the day (or more like, Daddy desires because I am happy to dress up in anything…well, that we agree on… as long as we play 😉 ), that is the route we go.  To me, it gets us in the mood for a specific play time.  Daddy will change it up sometimes, but I basically know what will be the outcome for us both in whatever thing we are doing that playtime.

*Pic found and used from Tumblr

Non-Kink into Kink – Day 27 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 27: Do your non-kink interests ever find their way into your kinky activities? If so, how?

I think there is more non-kink into kink than there is kink into non-kink.  Like music. That’s a normal non-kink thing to listen, enjoy and dance to, yet it is so useful in kink.  Such as bringing in mood to the scene or using in headphones to block out the sense of hearing.

Everyday useful tools, such as rope, used for tying things down or up outside being used for shibari or bondage; wooden kitchen spoons, normally used for cooking being used for spankings; clothes pins (eek!), used for hanging up clothes to dry being used for nipple clamps or other places on the body to bring the pain into a play scenario; these are all normal non-kink things that are brought into kinky activities.

And as for writing, there are so many scenarios that are used for non-kink writing that can be pushed into a kinky mindset or scenario.  I, as a developing writer, love to be pushed with new ideas of things to write about.  New twist and turns to use and ideas I have never thought of to write about.  A lot of times they come from normal, every day occurrences and turn them into kinky occurrences/scenes from there.

So, yes, non-kinky activities and things very easily find their way into kinky activities! 😉

*Fun Pic used from Pinterest

 

Online BDSM Play – Day 26 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 26: What’s your opinion on online BDSM play?

Well, since I have had both online BDSM play and RL BDSM play, I have to say RL is much better!  But, I met Daddy online and we played that way for over a year.  It can be done.  With communication and openness to things, you make it work.

Online you are restricted to only being able to do a few things on your own. Like popping your butt with paddles!  When you have a vivid imagination like I do, and a Daddy that can describe things to feed that imagination, and fingers and toys that can do the rest to build you up to that release, it works.

In a LDR it has to work when you can’t get together on a regular basis.  But, when you can be in the same space it’s amazing!!  And you take advantage of every moment you have together to experience the things you have found you love as well as trying new things together.

And that’s my take on online BDSM play 😉

 

*Pic used from Pinterest

Open About Your Kinks – Day 25 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 25: How open are you about your kinks?

With those in the lifestyle and here on my blog, totally open! For those in the vanilla world and family, not so much.

Here I am able to be open about my kinks along with my friends in the lifestyle and a very few amount of friends who understand and do not judge.  I can share my kinks, share my ideas and outlooks in the lifestyle and enjoy being emerged in all of it daily.

I know my family and friends would not understand my kinks and lifestyle nor interest in it.  So, I, like so many, keep that side of my life in the dark from family and friends.

It’s hard that it has to be done, but it does have to be done and is just normal for so many of us.  I feel to have the community here and in other places to share with, and have others to understand, is so important and such a wonderful bonus.  I find out more every day how expansive the community is and how supportive they are as well.  It’s so great!

So, again, I am open, but I’m not. 😀 😉

 

*Pic used from Pinterest

 

 

 

 

Partner Qualities – Day 24 of 30 Days of Kink

Day 24: What qualities do you look for in a partner?

There are many qualities I look for.  The immediate connection, the shared interests in everyday things and kinky things and that we can enjoy one another’s company.  That we are comfortable with one another and can talk about anything.  That I feel safe and can trust my partner.  That my partner is a strong person and confident in himself and how he lives.  That even in a D/s relationship I can feel free to say how I feel and that I disagree without feeling the backlash of doing so.  To feel protected and guided yet able to do things freely if I feel the need to and not be put down for my views.

The most important of all the things I have listed above, is connection and trust.  If I feel at any point there is no connection or I am losing trust I used to disconnect and go inside myself to protect myself.  Now I am learning to say my peace and stand up for me.  There has to be self love and understanding I believe to have a healthy long standing relationship.  It doesn’t matter whether you are kink or vanilla.

And as Daddy has said over and over again, he does not want me as a weak individual but the strong woman he knows I am.  It means much more for me to give up my control to him, knowing I am strong enough in myself to do so.

 

*Pic used from Pinterest

Change in Interests/Perspectives – Day 23 of 30 Days of Kink

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Day 23: Since you first developed an interest in kink, have your interests/perspectives changed? How so?

Oh yes, I would say my interests/perspectives have changed.  Where I first thought I would only want to experience the soft side of kink/BDSM, such as bondage, nipple clamps and butt plugs.  And this all excited me.  Being tied down on the bed, the feel of the clamps squeezing my nipples tightly and the small butt plugs giving me the feeling of being full.

Now, not only do I love these things but I love so much more!

I now am totally into spankings (hand, wooden paddles, leather paddles, floggers and crop), shibari, costume play and so much more!  Love/hate the feel of wooden paddles with their sharp stingy pops, leather paddles with their soft thud, somewhat stingy pops, floggers with the stingy, fingers that caress and thud/hurt all at once and the quick sharp cracks and pops of the crop.  The beautiful art and feeling of non-control that shibari gives you in bondage is amazing.  Dressing in outfits like french maid, cheerleader and school girl, its so much fun in role play.  There are so many different and new things I have tried and am enjoying in this lifestyle.

 

*Pic used from Pinterest

 

A Healthy Relationship – Day 22 of 30 Days of Kink

 

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Day 22: What do you think is important in keeping a BDSM relationship healthy? How does it differ from a vanilla relationship?

Honestly, all relationships, whether BDSM or vanilla should all be looked at in the same way when keeping the relationship healthy.  There should be trust and communication in any relationship, whether vanilla or BDSM.  Unfortunately that is not how things work most of the time, which is sad.

In a BDSM relationship it is extremely important to keep the lines of communication open and be honest at all times about things. If you don’t have this on a normal basis someone can actually get really hurt.  Whether in play or regular daily routine.

A vanilla relationship should be treated the same, but unfortunately the everyday life and daily routines get in the way, for most people, of communication and making sure you are both honest with things.  This is how relationships break down and things go wrong.  It’s where a couple splits apart because there is no communication, no understanding, no honesty because each person is just trying to get through each day.

Don’t get me wrong, it happens with BDSM relationships as well.  But it should not happen, per the experts and those that realize how important it is to have a healthy relationship in BDSM.  You can’t be Safe Sane and Consensual if you can’t communicate, be honest with one another and trust.  At least that is my take on it.

What do you think?

*Pic used from Pinterest

BDSM Related Book – Day 21 of 30 Days of Kink

Day 21: Favourite BDSM related book (fiction or non-fiction)

One of my all time favorite book series I have read on my Nook, and had me getting each and every one of them, was the Wicked Lovers Series by Shayla Black.

They are Erotic Romance fiction and full of BDSM/kinky stories, each and every one of them! Yummy!!

You can find them on Amazon or Goodreads and I am sure many other places.

*Pic used from Pinterest